Love what you love ardently
Being a fan has made my life better
I have always been a big fan of stuff. The things I love, I love passionately. But I don’t like Stans, and let me tell you why. Fan culture in 2023, like many things, is pretty scary. Thanks to social media, I now associate Stans with negativity - with leaving bee emojis on people’s posts when they dare to go against the hive, with death threats to a pop star’s ex-boyfriend’s wife. With vitriol and coordination, with an almost militant desire to prove love for something by attacking everyone else. I guess it’s not surprising in a world where things are increasingly black and white, good and bad. Where you believe one thing or another, or come down firmly on one side.
However, the things I am a fan of have brought me nothing but joy. To me, that’s what being a fan is all about - enjoyment, feeling good. It’s not about seeking approval, it’s not even about seeking community with other fans, especially because the things I love ardently aren’t exactly super cool or even very popular. But for me, they are a force of positivity in my life. And when I do bond with other people over them, it’s great. It’s just not the point.
Being a vocal fan has led to brilliant experiences in my life. Shouting about Housewives led me to Bravocon last October, which was incredible. Screaming about loving commercial popular fiction got me a book deal. Professing a deep love for ALDI means that sometimes, Kevin the Carrot shows up at my door. Okay, the last one sounds weird, I’ll concede that.
I believe that loving the things I love passionately and actively not caring about popular things I perhaps SHOULD enjoy has improved my life dramatically. There is a particular, peculiar kind of rush when you understand a niche meme online about your fave, which in fact makes you feel understood on a profound level. For me, they key is to enjoy things you like wholeheartedly without making them about anybody else - ie, I don’t give a flying shite what other people think of Andrew Rannells or Alan Menken. They make me happy, and that’s all that matters. I will not go to war on their behalf, nor will I let other people’s opinions of them reduce my devotion. If only I could apply that mentality to myself, huh?
As an aside, let me say that I am profoundly grateful that none of the things I am a fan of have revealed any evil or despicable tendencies. That must be SHIT when it happens to your fave.
Here are some things of which I am a huge fan. I am putting it out in to the universe that if ever there is an opportunity in any of these spheres, I am your woman.
TELEVISION
My degree may be in Film Studies, but telly has my heart. I just prefer the medium - it feels more natural, more casual, even though it absolutely isn’t. I’d rather watch five hours of a tv show than a two hour film - that’s just a fact. Drama, comedy, dramedy, reality, documentary, gameshow, I just love it all. I love that shows have time to develop, that we can dig in to them over time. I love the surprise and delight of finding a new show to love, and I love the comfort of rewatching something I already know I adore. I LOVE TELLY.
MUSICAL THEATRE
But, not all musical theatre and a lot of musical films as well. I don’t just blanket love everything that’s been on Broadway or in the West End. But there is nothing as pure to me as a show tune. In another life, I would like to come back with Lea Michele’s voice and someone else’s personality. Wicked, Little Shop of Horrors, Legally Blonde, Chicago, RENT, Blood Brothers, Kinky Boots, Dear Evan Hansen, Six, Hamilton, Into the Woods. All exactly my jam. All but one originally written for the stage. Swoon.
See also: musical theatre stars. Nobody I know cares as much about Jonathan Groff or Andrew Rannells as much as I do. Nor should they. There is one video in existence of them together, performing for the crowds waiting to go and see Hamilton. My only sadness is that they are lip syncing and not singing. I wish they would get married.
ALAN MENKEN
Not unrelated to the above, he is a musical film and theatre composer and instrumentalist. He is the Disney songwriter to end all Disney songwriters. He is a tiny, sweet little man whom I love deeply. Nobody knows who he is, many don’t care. He wears stained jumpers to play the piano at retrospectives. It is a lifelong dream to meet him. Doireann Garrihy will tell you that I often bully her because she has actually met him, and did not care that much.
ROMCOMS
I’m not as fussy with these as I am with musicals. I pretty much like them all. But there are of course top tier ones, When Harry Met Sally being the GOAT. I will write a romantic movie, whether it ever gets made or not.
DISNEY
I am an unashamed Disney adult. I love animals, cute things, singing and am gullible enough to always seek out a sense of wonder. I’m really only cynical when I try.
I especially love Disney World and its sibling parks. I cry every time I see Mickey Mouse in real life. I am perhaps a loser, but at least my heart is full when I’m losering.
THE BEATLES
I know, it’s so niche to be a fan of the biggest band of all time. How UNUSUAL of me. But I love them, and I always will. I have their albums framed on my walls. I will be devastated when Paul McCartney dies. I was devastated when we lost George Harrison. I know every word to every song, and recite them in my head like poetry. I walked down the aisle to their music. Seeing Paul live was a life highlight.
MY DIVAS
Idina Menzel. Kelly Clarkson. Bette Midler. Barbra Streisand. Cher. Tina Turner. Celine Dion. Faith Hill. If there’s one thing this bitch loves, it’s a booming female vocal.
00s REALITY TV
Separate to my love of telly, because this also involves loving real people and their real lives. I have long adored the Kardashians, even though many despise them. I will defend them lightly when they deserve it, but also remain unbothered if you think they’re the worst. However, they are as popular and rich as they are because so many people SECRETLY love them. Buy their stuff, watch their shows, click on links about them. I know what you’re all up to.
This category includes the Bravo canon, most things on HGTV, The Hills, early Big Brother, The X Factor when it was good and its singing predecessors. Also Newlyweds and all the brilliant early stuff MTV did, Drag Race and the Channel 4 stuff like Gogglebox and First Dates. It does not include Love Island, Love Is Blind, Selling Sunset and all that guff. I have standards. Netflix, call me if you want to do something decent yeah?
NEW YORK
I feel a deep and profound connection to the city, and I have since I first walked out of Penn Station in July 2006. If you know New York, you know that that’s the very worst part of it. But I was hooked, and I still am. I have decided that I only want to live there as a wealthy older lady, though. Retirement in New York is the dream.
NORA EPHRON
Her writing, her wit, her courage, her confidence. She is my biggest influence. She made the best romcoms of all time, and was the best essayist that has ever lived. She was also New York to the bone, and loved the Beatles. Go figure.
AUTUMN
The greatest season. Moderate temperatures, a nip in the air. A smell of firewood and chimneys, a beautiful, rust-coloured palette. Pumpkins and apples and spooky things and pretty leaves. The best!
COMMERCIAL FICTION
I have a whole other post about this, which you can read here. This fandom has inspired a whole new chapter (geddit?) in my career. That is why loving what you love ardently, be it Twilight or romance novels or The Hunger Games, is so important. It might change your life.
If you enjoy my newsletters, do tell your mates! I don’t love promoting writing for free because professionals should be paid for their work, but I feel like this gets my creative juices flowing and I get a lot out of that’s more valuable than cash to me right now. Thank you!
Vicky, reading this I feel like we were separated at birth - Maybe it’s in the name. Brilliant piece, please keep being a big fan and sharing the joy!